Significa protección a la esencia del otro. Frente a ese otro tenemos la obligación de reconocer que somos distintos, de aceptar esas diferencias y de no presionarlo para que sea de la forma que nosotros queremos que sea. En la medida en que hacemos algo que sabemos que para el otro es una ofensa (interrumpirle cuando habla, ocultarle la verdad, etc.) estamos faltando el respeto con todas las de la ley.


Un buen ejemplo son las tareas de la casa. Algunos creen todavía que son exclusivamente femeninas. Es una labor rutinaria y estresante, en especial si la mujer trabaja también fuera de la casa. Y si además de no colaborar, el hombre también la critica...el tema se complica. Se puede considerar al otro estableciendo pautas: si ella cocina, él pone la mesa; si uno lava los platos, el otro los seca. Considerar, es tener en cuenta al otro.

Dos seres que se aman desean crear condiciones de bienestar del uno para el otro. La amabilidad básicamente tiene que ver con el deseo de que el otro se sienta bien. Siempre se puede ser amable, hasta para decir aquellas cosas que no estamos de acuerdo o que no nos gustan. Cuesta lo mismo decirlo, que decirlo bien.

Voluntad de compartir
La capacidad de compartir está íntimamente ligada al aspecto de "renuncia". Y el "siempre hay que hacer lo que tú quieras" surge cuando los dos tienen sistemáticamente deseos diferentes. Compartir es aceptar, ver la realidad aunque no nos guste; en cambio resignarse es decir que sí sin estar convencidos, lo que encierra enojos y resentimientos. Cada pareja tiene contratos tácitos, una especie de código en común, que alguna vez fue verbalizado o intuido, en el cual se saben qué cosas le gustan o no al otro, y cuáles son las que se espera de uno. La clave está en no olvidar ese contrato, respetarlo y renovarlo día a día.


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