El amor debe ser como una ensalada perfecta en el que todos los ingredientes sean saludables y potencien el sabor del otro. ¿Siente desde hace tiempo que se está distanciando emocionalmente de la persona que ama? ¿La insatisfacción, el tedio e incluso el malestar están cubriendo de sombras el vínculo entre ambos? Quizá uno de los dos se está despidiendo interiormente de la relación, y aún se esté a tiempo de remediarlo.

En las consultas de los psicólogos de pareja,  todos tienen un común denominador: indican que nuestra pareja necesita una profunda revisión, porque sus miembros han comenzado a alejarse el uno del otro, como dos barcos que antes navegaban a la par y aún están a la vista recíprocamente, pero siguiendo ahora rumbos diferentes.

Los especialistas definen “el despido interior”, como el cúmulo de circunstancias que van sumiendo a los miembros de la pareja en la falta de motivación y el desánimo, mientras cumplen con sus obligaciones mínimas para mantener las apariencias: “un proceso largo en el que la insatisfacción y la frustración, van distanciando las expectativas e ilusiones del inicio de la relación con la realidad de la convivencia”.

¿ES AMOR REAL O SÓLO APARENTE?

¿Qué sucede cuando la relación de pareja es únicamente una fachada y el amor y la complicidad sólo aparentes? ¿Podemos hacer algo para no caer en ello, o remediarlo cuando ya está sucediendo?

La relación de pareja no es fácil y tiene momentos amargos, pero en la pareja estamos acompañados, nos sentimos queridos, podemos desarrollar nuestro amor y compartir con la otra persona un proyecto de vida.

Si nos encerramos en nuestros problemas con una actitud pasiva, pensando que nuestra pareja ha cambiado sin tener derecho a hacerlo, esto puede ser el inicio del despido interior. Una actitud pasiva y victimista no deja que la relación fluya, desde la comunicación, la confianza y el amor.

Para hallar y generar buenos momentos en el día a día, la psicóloga sugiere reconocer los logros de nuestra pareja,  conseguir puntos de encuentro tanto en la obligación como en la diversión, ser detallista, demostrar nuestro cariño y amor hacia la otra persona,  a través del contacto y las caricias.

Las parejas deben poner en marcha su radar positivo, atentas a lo bueno y capaces de registrar todos esos espacios de satisfacción, por pequeños que sean, y también provocarlos. Esto es fundamental en el amor.

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